Love Every Body #3 – Shoulders, Arms and Hands

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Hello loves,
I have to admit that I was having a tough time trying to think about how I would write this one. There is still some way to go with accepting my body in all it’s flawed glory so I was hesitant to write about it. But the more I mulled over this, the more I knew that it was necessary for me to be transparent about my insecurities.

Shoulders

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You’re going to have a chuckle at this but I really love my shoulders 😀
They are broad, strong and have kept me walking with my chin up during the most trying times. That term ‘world upon your shoulders’ ? It rings very true for me.

So..I get my dad’s tanned skin and shoulders. It is hilarious how I have contrasting body parts thanks to mom and dad.

Due to my years of learning classical Indian dancing as well as other forms of dance, keeping my shoulders straight and strong comes naturally. But I like to think of my shoulders as swimmers shoulders. I am a swimming enthusiast, and my shoulders propel me through the water with ease.

Most Asian women have smaller shoulders so it is hard to find a blouse that will not have an unseemly gap between a button. I swear it sometimes feels like I am The Incredible Hulk when trying tops or dresses! But when I do find the right fit for me, my shoulders look rather nice.

Arms

My arms are like that of my mom’s – ample, fleshy. I detested them for a really long time! But I was always brought crashing down to my senses when I strained it and realised how important they were.

My arms have been gawked at or glanced at by strangers and people I know. I am very sharp when it comes to making observations. I go sleeveless or strapless a fair bit because I really cannot tolerate Singapore’s heat and humidity. I am not of those ladies who will compromise comfort over fashion, hell no. I perspire A Lot so I prefer the option of short sleeves or sleeveless.

I certainly do wish that my arms were less unsightly with their weird fleshy bits. If you think it is easy for me to pose for photographs with my bare arms, think again. If you think I am immune to the stares and glances,
think again.

But do you know what?
Underneath the ample flesh, these are some bloody strong arms. I move furniture or heavy objects around the house with no trouble at all. I throw my arms around my loved ones for a loving embrace and I am pretty affectionate so there is a lot of hugging, throwing an arm around a shoulder/waist when I am around. My arms allow me to carry my pet cats and dogs, to scoop them up and pepper their faces with kisses.

There also is a personal reason behind not wearing long sleeved or full sleeved outfits. I hid the lashings, cane marks and self-mutilation for years by covering up. I was embarrassed and ashamed. Well not anymore.

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Hands

My hands, like my forearms and arms have seen a lot of strife. I also cannot do without using my hands to blow my ever-irritable nose, type like I am doing at this very moment, enjoy my meals, soothe my temples..they are a very very busy pair of hands! Oh gosh that sounds so odd :p

My culture definitely has a part to play here. Being Indian, I greet my elders by putting my hands together. I apply henna on them when the occasion or festival calls for it and adorn them with bangles. I eat with my hands when eating from a banana leaf.

The hubster, his mom and mine like to run their hands across mine because I have soft, unblemished hands that according to them have not seen a day of hard labour in this life. Come to think of it, they are quite right. I play the piano, read books, type out posts and emails…not the kind of stuff that will make my hands coarse. I can’t do that much house work because of my allergies, I don’t carry the heavy groceries and I don’t cook very much.
I use my hands to lift weights, that’s the roughest load it carries. I don’t apply nail polish on my fingernails because well, I suck at painting my nails.

I do have sensitive skin (or as I like to say, I have sensitive ‘everything’ – from my scalp to my soles) so I keep the hands moisturised with calendula because the skin on my fingertips tend to peel. My hands are a little chubby but they aren’t short, I think they’re quite cute actually 🙂

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To sum this post up, I am very grateful for my shoulders, arms and hands. They are strong and graceful, they are in good working condition and I really can’t complain.

This was easier than I thought it would be. I don’t know what all that apprehension was about!

Til my next post,
ciao 🙂

xxxo Aarti Olivia

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16 thoughts on “Love Every Body #3 – Shoulders, Arms and Hands

  1. Your arms look so soft. I bet a hug from you feels like heaven. I’m glad this was easier than you thought! I think sometimes we have to challenge our OWN perceptions of ourselves, as well as society’s as a whole.

    I’ve tweeted and Facebooked this post. x x

    1. spot on Leah! It’s more my state of mind when Im showing the world my lumpy bits than society itself. There are some real idiots out there, but my own critic does me more harm I think. and yes, my arms are very soft and I have to stop my mom, hubby and friends from caressing them because it tickles! sending you a warm soft hug my friend! thank you for sharing my post xx

  2. I have always been sensitive about my arms. I had a dance teacher who told me she picked costumes to hide them. I still cannot wear tank tops without feeling uncomfortable. What a great post and I really appreciated reading your thoughts on your shoulders, arms, and hands. I need to sit down and do the same.

    1. You know, I had the same issue in dance classes..my peers and teacher would stare if I went sleeveless. But I can’t help having softer arms that are fleshier! My mom, hubster and friends caress my arms and always marvel about how soft they are. Im still a little conscious about camisoles or strapless tops but honestly in the larger scheme of thing..everyone’s walking around with their load of insecurities. You have nothing to hide my friend 🙂

    1. Thank you babe, I think it’s important for me to be open so that others can feel brave to do the same. and You will be surprised by how very small my following is..but do you know what? I love my followers and appreciate each of them. My country isn’t even aware of me so let alone other places, but I don’t think about the numbers game much. I didn’t even expect 10 people to follow my blog when it started, so Im very cool with this 🙂

  3. As usual we are our own worst critics. Here’s the first thing I noticed about you: You have the most beautiful, smooth skin and a beautiful smile that seems to light up your face.
    xo
    styleontheside.com

    1. Oh yes, that’s for sure! and thank you for the really sweet compliment, I was ready to do my ostrich thing – bury my head into the pillow, like an ostrich buries it’s head into the ground – hee hee. You my dear, have a radiant face and beautiful smile! and I hope there will always be reasons everyday to keep that darling smile on your face 😀

  4. I LOVE your blog, self-esteem, and presence so much, sister, It is here that I often come for an emotional boost. You radiate love, my friend. As a big girl, myself and blogging about loving the body, you are an inspiration to me. I love that you are so young and are so clearly ahead of your time, our time. Keep it coming! You help so many people. 🙂

    1. oh Lizzy, your words made my eyes well up. I am glad my words are a
      boost! That is exactly what I aim to do with this blog, empower others and myself. I am very touched and if I could, I’d be giving you a warm hug. Thank you so much

  5. This post made my heart sing. I possess the same fleshy arms and have struggled with accepting them. But I will not hide them in the summer heat, and I should love them, too – the arms and hands that hold my daughter, that clean my house, that write my stories, that paint my photos, that cook my meals, that hug my loved ones so tightly.

    1. Ember, I am so happy you feel braver about showing your arms. It’s not a crime to have fleshy arms! Giving you a great big hug

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